Leigh's Views

 A few weeks ago, I got an email from a local theater. A little note letting me know that on Tuesdays tickets, popcorn and drinks were cheaper. Okay, I'll bite and be brave - go to the movie theater for the first time in 18 months. Opening the app, I looked at what movies were available and bought a ticket to 'Free guy'. There I was on that Tuesday, standing in an empty parking lot wondering if it was some kind of joke. The ticket window didn't even exist anymore. Taking a huge breath, I decided to try the door. To my surprise, it opened to the dim lobby. One lone person stood behind the concession stand, she was playing with her phone and ignoring me. I spotted a row of machines off to one side, you know the ones - like they have at airports to get your tickets. I walk over and yup, that's how you check-in at the theater now. Next, I head over to the lone employee to get popcorn. I don't drink soda, thus I had water in my purse. She gets the popcorn for me, ask...

So, the other week I went to a museum with a friend of mine. There was a lot of old farming equipment and for whatever reason, most of it wasn’t labeled or identified in anyway.   Thus, my friend was trusting me to know what most of the stuff was since I’m from farm country out West. We were doing fine until we turned a turn and she stopped dead in her tracks and turned to me, “What in the world is a wooden treadmill doing in here?!’ Ah, yeah, I could instantly see why there was confusion on this point. My friend was thinking in terms of exercise equipment not farm equipment. Okay, I quickly explained the purpose of the thing. Oh, and in case you, my dear reader, don’t know – it’s for oxen. They walk on the treadmill to provide power to basic farm equipment like threshers and such. Well, the look of puzzlement on my friend’s face was rather comical. Pretty obvious she’d never heard of such a thing. Then, a frown started to grow, eyes scrunched up, a finger began to tap her lips. Fi...

  Now I shop quite a bit online. Not sure if I’m doing more now because of the pandemic or not, but that’s a debate for another day. On a somewhat frequent basis after a purchase, I’ll get a note from the company. Thanking me, asking me if I’m happy, giving me further details on the product and/or a coupon for a future purchase. I’m sure you’ve gotten these little notes as well. For the most part, they are business like, stiff and formal. Many don’t even bother to say ‘Hello’ or any other form of greeting. Then this week, I got this email ‘Only you can help us fulfill our Destiny’ – uhm, what? The sender was from a company I’d placed an order from but this was a rather odd subject line. Curious, I opened the note. And as I was reading it, I was wondering if this company had accidentally sent me an email created by a child during a ‘take your kid to work’ event. Because there wasn’t anything business like about the thing. Yup, it was addressed to ‘My dear accomplice in rodent contro...

  Amber   “Ugh! I’m so glad you finally landed or whatever it’s called!” I huffed as I drew closer. “I’ve been wandering around this lake for hours. The bugs have been eating me alive! I never should’ve let you go alone…” He started to stand in the canoe, I was a worried it would tip. However, it only gave a slight sway as he moved towards me. “I need you to walk towards me very slowly, Amber.” He hissed softly as he held out his hand. “I ain’t getting in that thing! You’ve gotta be joking, right?!” My arms crossed my chest in an automatic defensive move, my feet planted firmly on the ground, hips wide. Before I knew quite what was happening, he took a flying leap from the boat. The effect of which was to push me to my knees off to one side before he hit the ground with a sickening thud. “Shoo, go on get!” He screamed, pounding on the dirt. I turned my head and saw him crawling towards the bushes. What in the world was he doing? It was about at that point I spotted t...

Mark Amber piped up in two seconds flat, “Oh, how fun! We’d love to go out on the water!” As she turned her big brown eyes toward me, I melted. But, hot darn, girl. Last night I couldn’t even set up a tent. Nor could I light a fire. And then there was me sitting like a schoolboy, unable to make any kind of gesture in response to her clinging to my hand all night. Yet somehow, I was now supposed to get a canoe and take her on a romantic row around this lake. A body of water which was so big, I couldn’t see the other side clearly with my naked eye. However, as I puffed out my chest, I wasn’t going to admit another ‘I’m not as much of a man as this guy’ defeat. Not with this male specimen showing up every other minute to show my lady what a ‘real’ man was. Okay, fine, I’m sure it was in his job description somewhere that he had to be an expert in everything outdoors. “Lead the way to the canoes, good sir.” I said as I started to stand up. Unfortunately for me, my feet got caught in ...

  Amber As I continued to stare into the fire, I knew I should’ve gotten up and helped with our meal. However, I wasn’t feeling in the mood. To be perfectly honest, I was rather queasy  at this point and food was the last thing I was wanting. Fine, fine, cooking is woman’s work. And as a good wife who was wanting to fix her marriage, I should’ve jumped up in a heartbeat and whipped up a gourmet meal for my love. The radio crackled as he turned it on. A bit of static now has he futz with the dials. Wait, what?! Is that news he put on? No, that isn’t even close to romantic! “Hey, dear, uhm…” I started, “I know you love listening to what’s going on in the world but…” “Amber,” I just knew Mark was rolling his eyes even though I couldn’t see his face from my position by the fire. “you’ve got to stop living in the clouds. Especially now, get your feet firmly planted on the ground.” Gritting my teeth so I wouldn’t scream, “Whatever.” I snorted in reply, trying to focus on t...

  Mark   We probably would’ve sat in our silent standoff forever, except behind me I could hear a vehicle stopping. Turning my head a bit, I could see the logo of the park on the side of a white truck. Uh oh, did we do something wrong? The park ranger hopped out. Waving a greeting as he said, "Hey, hope you're enjoying your day so far. However, you can't park just off the side of the road like that." He pointed to my car, smiling all the while. “And Sam at the office said neither of you asked for wood. But with y’all in tents, you probably will be needing some. This close to the lake, the mosquitos gonna eat you alive even if you have bug spray. The smoke from a fire will be a huge help.” He chuckled at this. I breathed out a big sigh. My escape hatch had just gone out the window, no making a quick break for it later if things went south. And what was this about being eaten by bugs? The guy was making some weird joke, right? Yeah, I knew about mosquitos in theor...