Over the
weekend a bunch of my girlfriends and I met up for a girls night out. One
friend, who is never late, was the last to arrive. She made her apologies then
made a statement to the effect of where’s the darn waitress because she needed
a stiff cocktail. This raised more than a few eyebrows around the table since
she’s famous for being a teetotaler. After we’d settled in a bit she explained.
She and her husband had decided to do a project around the house. Since he worked
all day, he asked her to arrange for contractors to come and give estimates.
Like she was just sitting around all day eating bon-bons and not running a
part-time business from home. Fine, she does this, they discuss the pros/cons
of each, pick a contractor. She calls the chosen one, arranges for the work to
be done. Then her husband gets home from work and gets all upset because it
wasn’t the right time to be jumping into a project, something else was a bigger
priority, blah, blah, blah. She ends her litany with, “Why do men have to be so
insane? I wasted days on this crud!” To which another of my friends jumps in
and states she once had a fight with a guy over a sweater. Uhm, what? She goes
on to explain how she used to have an apartment in a really, old drafty
building. Thus, she always wore this ratty old sweater when she was home.
Apparently, she dropped several hints to her boyfriend at the time about how
she needed to move. She was thinking, him being a man he would know how to find
a better apartment with no drafts. Yet, she never once actually said this to
him. Then one day, her sweater was in the wash and so she was wearing a
different one when he showed up. Well, he freaked out and started screaming
about no way in heck could she move in with him. It didn’t matter how many
hints she dropped that option was off the table. Well, that thought had never
once even crossed her mind. She ended her story with, “So I kicked his
irrational butt to the curb. I could do that, I wasn’t married to the idiot.
You? You’re stuck with stupid.” Ouch. However, everyone at the table was
laughing until it hurt by this point. But both stories do drive home the point
of how important communication is. Who knows why my first friend’s husband changed
his mind – finances didn’t seem right, bad day at work, whatever. Since he
never shared with my friend, she was left feeling frustrated and used. My
second friend just shouldn’t have been so subtle, she should’ve stated what she needed
from the guy in no uncertain terms. Then the misunderstanding wouldn’t have
ever happened. Never assume everyone around you knows what you are going
through, what you mean and what you need. We are each our own person after all, try as we might to understand those around us.
Over the
weekend a bunch of my girlfriends and I met up for a girls night out. One
friend, who is never late, was the last to arrive. She made her apologies then
made a statement to the effect of where’s the darn waitress because she needed
a stiff cocktail. This raised more than a few eyebrows around the table since
she’s famous for being a teetotaler. After we’d settled in a bit she explained.
She and her husband had decided to do a project around the house. Since he worked
all day, he asked her to arrange for contractors to come and give estimates.
Like she was just sitting around all day eating bon-bons and not running a
part-time business from home. Fine, she does this, they discuss the pros/cons
of each, pick a contractor. She calls the chosen one, arranges for the work to
be done. Then her husband gets home from work and gets all upset because it
wasn’t the right time to be jumping into a project, something else was a bigger
priority, blah, blah, blah. She ends her litany with, “Why do men have to be so
insane? I wasted days on this crud!” To which another of my friends jumps in
and states she once had a fight with a guy over a sweater. Uhm, what? She goes
on to explain how she used to have an apartment in a really, old drafty
building. Thus, she always wore this ratty old sweater when she was home.
Apparently, she dropped several hints to her boyfriend at the time about how
she needed to move. She was thinking, him being a man he would know how to find
a better apartment with no drafts. Yet, she never once actually said this to
him. Then one day, her sweater was in the wash and so she was wearing a
different one when he showed up. Well, he freaked out and started screaming
about no way in heck could she move in with him. It didn’t matter how many
hints she dropped that option was off the table. Well, that thought had never
once even crossed her mind. She ended her story with, “So I kicked his
irrational butt to the curb. I could do that, I wasn’t married to the idiot.
You? You’re stuck with stupid.” Ouch. However, everyone at the table was
laughing until it hurt by this point. But both stories do drive home the point
of how important communication is. Who knows why my first friend’s husband changed
his mind – finances didn’t seem right, bad day at work, whatever. Since he
never shared with my friend, she was left feeling frustrated and used. My
second friend just shouldn’t have been so subtle, she should’ve stated what she needed
from the guy in no uncertain terms. Then the misunderstanding wouldn’t have
ever happened. Never assume everyone around you knows what you are going
through, what you mean and what you need. We are each our own person after all, try as we might to understand those around us.
Comments
Post a Comment