Ode to the radio

I love to find local radio stations when I travel.  No, not because I have to have my favorite music.  It’s because I love the crazy local ads you sometimes hear.  The ones that go beyond the obvious use of local words for things, like soda for pop or dinner for supper.  No, I’m talking about the ones that must have some meaning locally which goes right over the heads of anyone who’s never been there before.  I’m sure you’ve heard them too.  Those ads that have you scratching your head, going “Huh?!”  Take these ones I heard recently – “When the aliens have landed we have your cellphone.”  Uh, okay.  Does that mean they never have cellphones since there are no aliens?  “Green eggs and ram, green eggs and rams.”  Yeah, I don’t think I want to know what that means.  Because it sure sounds to me like there might be big problems on the farms around here.  “Mac and cheese fest…”  Yum, you’ve got me interested, “your favorite food with your favorite chilies.”  Wait, they put chilies in mac and cheese?  And like it?  Not sure how I feel about that.  “Have a fudging good time.”  Yikes, where I’m from if you use the word ‘fudge’ for something other than the candy it’s a swear word.  Let’s hope they’re referring to candy here.  In addition to those ads, you also get the joy of local news, weather and sometimes community events.  Like the crowning of the corn queen.  Or so and so’s son is back in town after being gone for 20 years.  The smaller the town serviced by the station, the more fun it seems to be.  So the next time you hit the road, don’t rely on satellite or Pandora.  Find local radio instead – you’ll find it’ll make the trip much more entertaining even if you don’t end up listening to much music you like.  Unless you like weird country music and Mexican mariachi music.  Yeah, I don’t know why but for some reason those stations seem to have the strongest signals no matter where you are in this country.  That might be one of the biggest mysteries in the universe...